everyone has a moment

where reality hits them square in the face.

I had my moment today. I was driving to my college campus, thinking about getting ready for Prom after class, when Star 101.5 played a song dedicated to the graduating class of 2009. It was Baz Lurhmann's Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen). I was about to get out of my car when I had to stop and listen to it. I couldn't move. I was completely captivated by the spoken word, and it brought me to tears. It wasn't overtly sentimental, it wasn't jubilant or celebratory. But it's simplicity made me realize - I am going into the world. Somehow it managed to sum up the fact that I'm leaving the nest and I'm not quite sure what's in store for me but I'm going to jump into it head on. It's unbelievable, that this is the final culmination of my public schooling. While it was happening it seemed to last for so long, but now as I reach the home stretch I realize that the rest of it moved by quickly and this year has been the single longest. But this week is moving very, very fast. It's almost too fast for me to comprehend, for me to hold on.

It's a big, lonely world out there. And I don't know if I'm prepared. I don't know if anything can really prepare me for it. But if I've got my friends, my family, and a bright disposition towards the future, I think I can come out of it a little better than before. I want to live in New York at some point in time (and leave before it makes me hard). I want to receive and give a love letter at least once. I want to travel a lot, and see all there is that I can. I want to speak Arabic and be a translator. I want to study in a foreign country. I want to live in an artist's flat. I want to at some point, be poor and working all the time doing gigs, but be at my absolute happiest at the same time. I want to have everything life can give me. I want to kiss in the rain, dance under the stars, and make love during a sunset. I want to run barefoot on the beach, I want to be charitable even when things suck. I want to be accomplished and humble, but I want to be proud of my life. I want to fall in love. I want to feel loved in return.

I want to be free, and wear sunscreen.

The video: Everyone's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) by Baz Lurhmann